Crossroads

Back in November I lost my horrible job.

Almost immediately, sensations I didn't even realize I'd lost returned to my extremities and food started tasting better. Within a few weeks I had healthier bowels and I started to feel the warmth of empathy returning to my soul. I think my hair is thicker. My smile comes more easily. Slowly, light is returning to the blood in my veins and mine eyes can see the glory.

It was as if a weight was lifted off of my shoulders, admittedly just as another was put on (WhatDoIDoNow???), but any relief at losing a job is a sign that it was the wrong job. I already knew that.

So the question is: what do I do now?

My brother-in-law found me a nice temp job. There isn't even a phone at the desk, which is pretty close to heaven for me. I'm enjoying it, but it'll be over eventually and I wouldn't want to stay there forever even if I could.

I'm afraid of wasting more time. I hated customer service for years but I stayed. It was the hell I knew. I don't want to jump into another job just to pay the bills and get stuck again. The thing about time wasting is I'm already really good at it, so I should work on some other skills now. What I really need to do is go back to school, so I'm setting some goals with time limits on them.

I want to write. I want to make a career of that somehow. I'm afraid that I may not be good enough, but it's what I want. I haven't really persued it because I'm scared, but not trying hasn't made me happy so I'll try trying instead.

One of my goals for 2014 is to publish a blog entry at least once per week. If I miss a week I have to make it up. If I do extra in a week, it can't count toward a future week. This means you'll be hearing from me more often, whoever you are. Thanks for reading.